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Ego

A conversation with ZipD this afternoon went something like this:
ZipD: How come you and DogBone don't response to any of my invitation for Deathmatch sessions (we were just talking about the new Half Life 2 Deathmatch, which is a multiplayer game where we kill each other to gain points - for boasting rights.)

ringgit: em, perhaps we are just too busy?

ZipD: koteh. There's no such thing as too busy for gaming, unless you are saying that you are not interested in games anymore which I don't get because 90% of the time, you are bored. If the interest is there, you'll always make time. Is it because I always win in the game? Is it because your ego cannot take defeat?

ringgit: maybe.

What ZipD failed to see, after all these years, is that my interest for computer games is dwindling. The times of "utility sut" (for the economics) are long gone. Sure, I do play games once a while but I am not obsessed about them anymore. I don't play them till wee hours in the morning. I don't tax myself just to finish one more level.

Why is that so hard to see?

Yes, I may be bored 90% of the time but I do have other things to keep me occupied: I read blogs, I read books, I watch my favourite Friends DVDs, an episode of Amazing Race and sometimes, it is just so relaxing to lie in the bed listening to my favourite CDs and dreaming about places I wanted to go and about life in AU. Ego has nothing to do with it. It's just that our interest has moved into different direction. That is all.

Why must all of our conversations be about games and the industry? Don't we have other things to talk about anymore? Oh.. wait a minute.. we do have other things to talk about.. I just didn't want to because what's the point? You don't remember them. Yea, I know, your memory sucks. It's not your fault you can't remember things. As a friend, I can accept that. But I can still get frustrated over it, can't I? I can still assume that your memory capability is proportionate to your interest in the subject, can't I?

So... yeah, I am not that enthusiastic about the next-big thing in gaming anymore. It still pique my interest, sure, but I am not dying to play them. I'd rather read blogs at this point in time, thank you very much. Perhaps, I may regain my passion for games at a later time. Then you'll get to eat my rockets! As of now, let me continue reading Living in Egypt.

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