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I'm resting now, after 3 hours of sweeping, mopping and installing the
baby cot. Sen and mother are coming back to BU. We are very excited
about this because it will be us, our small family, on our own now. No
in laws or parents about.

Everytime I do things for sen, be it installing a cot or cleaning the
room for her or rocking her to sleep for 2 hours in the wee hours of
the morning or changing her dirty diapers, I can't help but think that
I'm not alone in this. All fathers would do the same. And I think that
my father must have done the same for me.

When I was cleaning every inch of the newly installed cot, rubbing
each rung meticulously with Dettol to kill germs (it's a hands me down
cot, btw), I was damn sure that my father would have gone through the
same ordeal for me.

As I was checking my bills and shaking my head over how expensive that
jab was (it was rm270 for a jab and there's more to come!) or how much
it has cost us thus far (just that 2 nights in the hospital giving
birth to sen cost a total of rm5k!!), I was sure my parents struggled
through the same financial challenge. It would be heavier for them as
their job then are not as highly paid as mine.

When I want to buy something I have to think twice and three times but
when it comes to stuff for sen, there's not a moment of hesitation.
It's not a wonder why my parents do not drive glamourous car nor live
in nice houses nor go for overseas tour. They simply can't.

It's easy to forget that our parents had done what we are doing for
our own children. How many times have you heard or seen people being
upset with their parents over how the parents treat their babies (ie
the grand children)? Or we begrudge our parents while we are holding
our child. How ironic is this scene?

We would take leave and fly to our babies immediately if they are
sick. But when our parents need to see the doctor we'll see if our
work schedule permits. Or we take them after work. Or we asked then to
take a cab. Or get the 'ahmad' to drive them.

I'm glad that I was able to constantly remind myself that my parents
had done the very same things that I am doing for sen. That means I
still now have time to return the favour to them. But it's not easy as
more often than not, I forget. We must constantly remind each other, ok?

Sent from iPhone


  1. My parent outsourced to work to some one else when I was a baby. I do appreciate the food, lodging and education that they provided to me though.

  2. It's ok, when your children grew older, they knew and understand the effort you have given to them with your pair of hands. If you outsourced, next time when your kids grew up, they think by giving you money will means they have done their responsibility. Children learn from their parents, and it's true to the bone. One of my colleague told me, she has her mother in law in a old folks home. One day, the children told my colleague - 'Don't worry mom, I will take care of you when you grow old. I will find the "best" old folks home for you'! Moral of the story - Money is not everything.

  3. BTW, welcome to your small own family :) ... keep my wine well, one of the day, we'll stop by and party with little sen, hehe

  4. I am a strong supporter on this topic. Well said.....while we are maturing in life, while our next generation is growing up... our elders are growing old, they have sacrificed their shares for us long time ago or still doing it, I just think we ought to appreciate and value them while they are still with us :)


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