Saturday, August 07, 2004

Sakit

As far back as 5 years ago, I was extremely thin. I am 180cm and I weighed about 56kg. Back then, that was the lowest point of my life. I am guessing that was the sole reason why I could not attractive girls. Everybody is telling me to eat up, gain more weight.. you looked better that way. But what they don't understand is that it's not about eating nor not doing exercise. I ate a lot. I just have very powerful body metabolism - so no matter how much I ate, it wouldn't help increase the kgs.

I brought this subject up because yesterday, while leaving the office, I bumped into a colleague. We worked together on a project many years ago. She commented that I'm "gemuk" which I replied it's a good thing. She agrees stating that last time I was so "slim", "macam sakit". That term "macam sakit" hits me full in the face! Was it that bad? Do I really looked like some malnourished walking human zombie? Is that why all the girls that I've woo-ed dumped me for someone else?

It's not my fault that I can't gain weight. I tried! I really did! All these years.. I ate and ate and ate and pray that I can reach 60kg but I never did. I even tried those protien drinks and what not to no avail. Is it fair that I am punished for something beyond my control?

Guess life's never fair. I have 25 years to accept that. That was why I can be nonchalant about things these days. What could one do if the forces of nature is strongly against one?

Having said all this, I am very thankful to God that He has finally granted me my wish. I am now 72kg and looked pretty good :)

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Bahija said...
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